Today I decided to be honest with myself and I have to face the truth - my looks aren't the reason why I don't have a girlfriend/sex. If that was the case, I wouldn't have a girlfriend when I was 20 and looked worse than I do now at 30.I'm a late bloomer and a confirmation that men age like wine. Okay, I'm not making women turn heads when I'm outside, although sometimes I will catch a girl give me long eye contact if I do the same. But I'm not bad looking either.My last gf broke up with me in december because of my depression and I met her by cold approach method. She told me later she wanted me to approach her and was glad I did.With all that supposed reinforcement I still don't believe in myself. Online dating and the fact I dated so many women but they all ghosted/friendzoned me after 1 or 2 dates broke me. I think the problem wasn't with me but with them.So here I am, lonely as fuck, depressed as shit, horny and sexually frustrated as all hell and don't know what to do, where to start even, I know OLD is not working for me, screw it! But I work from home, work out at home, live in a shithole with either old people, married middle agers or kids, no people my age or similar.
>>31205737So yeah my problem is I don't know where to begin even. I stopped watching porn completely, work out, have a shitty paying job, live in a small town of 4K people, if I go out which is rare, I only go for a walk and that's it.
>>31205737Ew. Why is her ass so fat and saggy? Disgusting.
>>31205737Get a concrete goal and work towards it. Break the goal down into smaller steps and do that daily. "I want to change my life" is not a goal because it is too abstract. "I want to be healthy and in shape" is a goal. You can work towards that goal every day by eating right, exercise, and marking your progress and PRs. If you have enough good goals, women (and other people in general) like you. If you have bad or no goals you may have a bad life.If you've been on 4chan for any amount of time you might have noticed people are always asking how to get a gf with no good answers. This is because 'how get gf' is a red herring question. There is nothing you can do to get a gf because getting a gf has almost nothing to do with women themselves but your lifestyle changes (i.e. dont be a basement dwelling asocial freak to start).
>>31205892ya
>>31205791Lots of people aren't attractive. Not saying they're ugly, but they aren't attractive. That's the great curse of humanity. A bunch of unremarkable people living for no good reason, and forcing the next generation into the fray for no good reason but "it feels good to cum inside her"
>>31205892>Get a concrete goal and work towards it.How does it make me get a gf? I already have my goals set and work towards them but nothing changes except maybe I get closer to said goal. How will a woman know >Ok, this guy is datable because he has goals>If you've been on 4chan for any amount of time you might have noticed people are always asking how to get a gf with no good answers. Yes this is indeed what I noticed.>There is nothing you can do to get a gf because getting a gf has almost nothing to do with women themselves but your lifestyle changes (i.e. dont be a basement dwelling asocial freak to start).Okay but it's a start. Don't be this or don't be that, be like this etc. ARE advice that many men nowadays need. It's certainly what I need. But having NOTHING to lean on in my life, in a social meaning, IDK where to start. OK, I can turn off my computer and don't sit on 4chin, but it won't get my anywhere. IDK basic steps to life practically.
>>31205943>How does it make me get a gf?It does not. It gets you a gf in the same way wiping your ass gets you a gf. Of course wiping your ass after you shit has nothing to do with getting a gf strictly speaking, but if you don't do it you will not get a gf because your ass is caked in shit. People do not like other people with stinky shit caked ass. Now maybe you don't have a stinky shit caked ass, but perhaps there are other habits you are not doing that keep you from having a gf. I don't know what they are you have to figure that out. >IDK where to start.Look around for problems to solve. Start by solving this problem. Clean your living spaces. Try a new cooking recipe. Learn to do something you already know how to do better or more efficiently. Take a small amount of time every day to look for a new problem to solve or something to optimize. Write down what kind of person you want to be then identify the steps you need to take to do that. Then do that.
>>31205981>but perhaps there are other habits you are not doing that keep you from having a gf. I don't know what they are you have to figure that out.Well GGs, IDK what that would be. Also I don't belive this notion of>Just do basic things, they won't get you a gf but they are necessary to get a gfBecause everyone I know who wanted to have a gf, they focused on it. It's like if I want to buy groceries, I know I have to do X,Y,Z to end up in my apartment with the groceries I need.>Write down what kind of person you want to be then identify the steps you need to take to do that. Then do that.Dude my only problem is that I don't have a girlfriend, am lonely and sexless. Other than that I'm cool, maybe except for depression which I AM working on.
>>31206000Well, lonely can be solved without a girlfriend. The small town might make it more limited, but there have to be community events or hobbies that bring people together. Grow your network of friends and surround yourself with good peoples.
>>31206000>Because everyone I know who wanted to have a gf, they focused on it.They also don't neglect the rest of their life. Clearly there is something wrong with /you/ because /you/ are the one without a gf. I don't know what that is. If you feel you know better carry on then.
>>31205981>if you don't do it you will not get a gf because your ass is caked in shit.India doesn't have a fertility problem, anon.
>>31205943>Okay but it's a start. Don't be this or don't be that, be like this etc. ARE advice that many men nowadays need. It's certainly what I need. But having NOTHING to lean on in my life, in a social meaning, IDK where to start.>OK, I can turn off my computer and don't sit on 4chin, but it won't get my anywhere. IDK basic steps to life practically.Is this a Howie thread?
>>31208324Probably. There's also a huge cross section of neurotic people with learned helpless who post here. Honestly, if you're going to come here to offer help you need to know which cases are beyond your help.
>>31205737Dating apps don't work for me, never have. I'm neither pretty enough to compete with readily available fuccboys that have sixpacks nor do I know how to take a good picture of myself.Buuut I'm also not a complete idiot, which gives me a lot of points on the second look, so I eventually realized I could never compete in dating apps.My approach to get to know girls was through social activities, like language courses but also side credits in university. That gave me a neutral platform to talk to pretty girls about the topic at hand and see how they tick. If they reacted positively to my suggestions on the topic at hand, I tossed some compliments, if they still reacted positively I tossed some more compliments and progressed this to a "totally not a date" kind of coffee.This gives her a platform where she has plausible deniability about who she's meeting with, ("it's totally not a date!!") which for some reason seems to be a big deal for girls.And this has gotten me a bunch of interested girls, including my wife.
>>31208386Dating apps worked 10 years ago. Now it's full of filth and trash women. Litteral leftovers any any diamond that shows there, disappears quickly.But IDK how to do teh other stuff. I'm so used to being 24/7 in my room that I have zero idea what else to do. I think it's over for me.I feel like if someone won't pick me up by force and tell me what to do, I won't achieve anything.
